Need A Place To Go To Really Piss Someone Off? Try Anime Forums!
Anime FanGirl: "I wrote this poem, I hope you all like it! ^______________^ LOLOLOLOLOLOL"
*Radom depression and emoness from a 16 year old who hasn't left the house or even lived a life on her own yet*
Anime Nerd: "Wow, that's really good ^__________________% oops, got an STD in my eye O_o LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL butsecks?"
Me: "Well written, but how is it you've experienced this type of misery when you have no responsiblities that would match these feelings since you live at home?"
Anime FanGirl: "You're a mean, unintelligent flamer! How dare you critique my work! You don't know anything even though you were a teen once!"
Member Name: You have been warned: Not liking a complete stranger bimbo's poem. You're suspended for 5 days.
Me: "Awesome."
Just a sample of the wonders and delights you'll be experiencing at my new gangbang. Now, like I've said, anime is a fun little side hobby to have on those boring Monday nights. On the other hand, this forum is quite a place to make wonderful friends, enemies, "mod-gods," yeah, a real friendly environment if you disagree or don't like someone's work! Eh, some of the people are nice, no ass kissing even required.
No wonder Something Awful forums require credit cards, it keeps the obnoxious teens out, or even half the unemployed who are complete idiots. Funny, how my title name has been changed from Senior Member, to the awesome Certified Jackass, to Igit. I'm not a douche bag, nor am I an idiot (except to people who don't like sarcasm, but they're not important...well, I take that back, they are important to satisfy my humor!), but since I disagree and use damn and self-censor, I've become one.
So, need tips on how to post on this forum? Look no further, because The Truth has just what you need!
1. Be like everyone else
No one here likes individuals, even though these pseudo-intellectuals constantly try to promote individuality. You have to like everyone's art, poems, opinions, etc. If you do not like them, then you are a flamer and an "Igit" and will be warned. Remember, ass kissing is EXTREMELY important. Who cares if it takes away from your dignity? This is Anime Forum, the last known haven for all anti-social rejects.
2. Fruits Basket and Naruto are the best animes
Again, you MUST like these animes or you're a fag, despite the fact these animes are for fags. If you do not like them, then you aren't considered a real man....which is funny, because I thought real men weren't fags...oh well.
3. Kiss the mod's asses and agree with whatever they say
So what if the forum is home to a bunch of pedophiles? So what if 11 year old girls are being hit on by adults? Bush is the cause of Hurricane Katrina and all misery in the U.S. You disagreed with me, you're banned. "Yeah, I agree with EVERYTHING you said! You're so smart and intelligent even though you just give into media tripe and come up with total crap! Way to tell that guy off! Now that I've fueled your internet ego up enough, give me a good reputation since its the only thing I have left vindicating my existance!" This is the TRUE way to treat a mod, since they are far greater than you. Pray you never argue with him or her against her opinions on which Sailor Senshi could kick the shit out of a DBZ character or which hentai babe is their secret crush. They are more experienced in simple HTML than you and are your gods...until you realize they are shunned by society and can only get power by banning sarcastic people or people that disagree with them, then post a bunch of nonsense about them, even lying about them. It's what they need to get off.
4. Take everything seriously
You're a teenager, you already know everything there is to know about life from your comfortable home and your parents spoiling you rotten. However, your life is still depressing because your mom won't let you out after 9 or give you an advance in your allowance so you can buy the latest Fallout Boy CD. This is a PERFECT reason to slit your wrists or tell everyone how miserable you are. How dare you try and cheer them up through sarcasm and jokes. You are an awful person, a spammer/flamer/idiot and should be banned for that. There is nothing worse than someone who can handle their own problems and even make fun of himself for good times. You should be hung by a tenticle entrail.
5. Final Fantasy is the best game ever made
Despite the fact that Betrayal at Krondor, Elder Scrolls, and several FPS games are classics, they are not as good as a few choice lines of emotion, anime sequences, big ass weapons that defy the law of gravity, and "kawaii moments" that are the Final Fantasy games...I mean "titles." I forgot, these games aren't games, but titles and are the greatest games ever made, even though Betrayal at Krondor, Elder Scrolls, and Zelda have been around longer than FF. The reason why no one remembers Krondor is because it's "too difficult to play" which really translates to "I don't want to take the time to learn to keep my weapons and food updated while the FF game does it for me." Seriously, if you don't like Sephiroth, you're a loser. Ouch, I'm a loser to anime and video game fans, for SHAME.
(Note: I like the Final Fantasy series, I just don't worship them like a nerd does a swimsuit model.)
6. Use emoticons and japanese words in every sentence
Me: So, how's your dad, is he better?
Anime Fan: Lol, he ish so kawaii in the hospital bed!!!! ^_________________^
Me:...but I thought he had several second degree burns after you lit a sparkler too close to him...
Anime Fan: Aren't I ish so BAKA??? LOLOLOLOL XD
Me: ....you're scaring me
Anime Fan: LOLOLOLOL ^_^ O_O XD >_>
Me: YOU'RE SCARING ME!!!!!!
I think that explains for itself.
So, there you have it. Just follow those six simple steps and you'll be on your way to hitting on children and kissing ass in no time!
On a special note, I would like you all to write several comments to Member Name on this site so I may give them to him so his internet ego can boost up. If anyone needs details, I'll e-mail you our wonderful conversations. If the rest of my fans know what I am talking about, then do not hesitate! You have one week!
grey.fox37@gmail.com
*Radom depression and emoness from a 16 year old who hasn't left the house or even lived a life on her own yet*
Anime Nerd: "Wow, that's really good ^__________________% oops, got an STD in my eye O_o LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL butsecks?"
Me: "Well written, but how is it you've experienced this type of misery when you have no responsiblities that would match these feelings since you live at home?"
Anime FanGirl: "You're a mean, unintelligent flamer! How dare you critique my work! You don't know anything even though you were a teen once!"
Member Name: You have been warned: Not liking a complete stranger bimbo's poem. You're suspended for 5 days.
Me: "Awesome."
Just a sample of the wonders and delights you'll be experiencing at my new gangbang. Now, like I've said, anime is a fun little side hobby to have on those boring Monday nights. On the other hand, this forum is quite a place to make wonderful friends, enemies, "mod-gods," yeah, a real friendly environment if you disagree or don't like someone's work! Eh, some of the people are nice, no ass kissing even required.
No wonder Something Awful forums require credit cards, it keeps the obnoxious teens out, or even half the unemployed who are complete idiots. Funny, how my title name has been changed from Senior Member, to the awesome Certified Jackass, to Igit. I'm not a douche bag, nor am I an idiot (except to people who don't like sarcasm, but they're not important...well, I take that back, they are important to satisfy my humor!), but since I disagree and use damn and self-censor, I've become one.
So, need tips on how to post on this forum? Look no further, because The Truth has just what you need!
1. Be like everyone else
No one here likes individuals, even though these pseudo-intellectuals constantly try to promote individuality. You have to like everyone's art, poems, opinions, etc. If you do not like them, then you are a flamer and an "Igit" and will be warned. Remember, ass kissing is EXTREMELY important. Who cares if it takes away from your dignity? This is Anime Forum, the last known haven for all anti-social rejects.
2. Fruits Basket and Naruto are the best animes
Again, you MUST like these animes or you're a fag, despite the fact these animes are for fags. If you do not like them, then you aren't considered a real man....which is funny, because I thought real men weren't fags...oh well.
3. Kiss the mod's asses and agree with whatever they say
So what if the forum is home to a bunch of pedophiles? So what if 11 year old girls are being hit on by adults? Bush is the cause of Hurricane Katrina and all misery in the U.S. You disagreed with me, you're banned. "Yeah, I agree with EVERYTHING you said! You're so smart and intelligent even though you just give into media tripe and come up with total crap! Way to tell that guy off! Now that I've fueled your internet ego up enough, give me a good reputation since its the only thing I have left vindicating my existance!" This is the TRUE way to treat a mod, since they are far greater than you. Pray you never argue with him or her against her opinions on which Sailor Senshi could kick the shit out of a DBZ character or which hentai babe is their secret crush. They are more experienced in simple HTML than you and are your gods...until you realize they are shunned by society and can only get power by banning sarcastic people or people that disagree with them, then post a bunch of nonsense about them, even lying about them. It's what they need to get off.
4. Take everything seriously
You're a teenager, you already know everything there is to know about life from your comfortable home and your parents spoiling you rotten. However, your life is still depressing because your mom won't let you out after 9 or give you an advance in your allowance so you can buy the latest Fallout Boy CD. This is a PERFECT reason to slit your wrists or tell everyone how miserable you are. How dare you try and cheer them up through sarcasm and jokes. You are an awful person, a spammer/flamer/idiot and should be banned for that. There is nothing worse than someone who can handle their own problems and even make fun of himself for good times. You should be hung by a tenticle entrail.
5. Final Fantasy is the best game ever made
Despite the fact that Betrayal at Krondor, Elder Scrolls, and several FPS games are classics, they are not as good as a few choice lines of emotion, anime sequences, big ass weapons that defy the law of gravity, and "kawaii moments" that are the Final Fantasy games...I mean "titles." I forgot, these games aren't games, but titles and are the greatest games ever made, even though Betrayal at Krondor, Elder Scrolls, and Zelda have been around longer than FF. The reason why no one remembers Krondor is because it's "too difficult to play" which really translates to "I don't want to take the time to learn to keep my weapons and food updated while the FF game does it for me." Seriously, if you don't like Sephiroth, you're a loser. Ouch, I'm a loser to anime and video game fans, for SHAME.
(Note: I like the Final Fantasy series, I just don't worship them like a nerd does a swimsuit model.)
6. Use emoticons and japanese words in every sentence
Me: So, how's your dad, is he better?
Anime Fan: Lol, he ish so kawaii in the hospital bed!!!! ^_________________^
Me:...but I thought he had several second degree burns after you lit a sparkler too close to him...
Anime Fan: Aren't I ish so BAKA??? LOLOLOLOL XD
Me: ....you're scaring me
Anime Fan: LOLOLOLOL ^_^ O_O XD >_>
Me: YOU'RE SCARING ME!!!!!!
I think that explains for itself.
So, there you have it. Just follow those six simple steps and you'll be on your way to hitting on children and kissing ass in no time!
On a special note, I would like you all to write several comments to Member Name on this site so I may give them to him so his internet ego can boost up. If anyone needs details, I'll e-mail you our wonderful conversations. If the rest of my fans know what I am talking about, then do not hesitate! You have one week!
grey.fox37@gmail.com
posted by Grey Fox at 11:23 PM
4 comments
