Your Blog Sucks: The Randomness That Is Emo
Let's jump ahead, doubling the age of 13 to 26. At this age, you pretty much should have a good idea of what you want to be, or already are what you want to be. Sadly, there are still those who cannot achieve this standard yet. There are several reasons attributed to this "hold back" such as being a Liberal, buying into everything the media says, blaming the government and others for your misery, still being emo/goth/prep/nerd, and even eating 2 week old hot pockets from mommy and daddy's basement.
The Randomness That Is Jesse perfectly emulates many of the points previously mentioned. It is a tragic tale of a girl born into a capitalist government to parents and friends that scorned her for her crazy left-wing ways, such as Barbie dolls being sex objects instead of political leaders, birds all over the world dying day by day, local band scene idiocity when she became a teen, to her whining of how the government screws her out of insulin and crystal meth. One day, however, she decided to take the path of her destiny, and, as Batman before her, donned her symbol: The Emo Glasses. Once put on, she feels the vibes of pseudo-intellectuality rise in her brain, giving her the necessary strength to bash the greatest country on the face of this planet. We shall call her The Dark Dork (sorry, Batman, you're still awesome in my book).
The title of the blog is pretty low on the boner meter (not to mention, elementary in the creativity department), unlike Gliss 'n' Goss, The Truth, and Freedom No Longer Frees You, but I can feel something move down there when I think of how awesome it could have been. Something like: "Dyke For Hire" or "Give Me My Fucking Insulin Or I Go Postal At Work Tomorrow." Man, I'm fucking awesome. I'm gonna go jack off to my thoughts now since I am such an egotistical asshole.
It doesn't stop there, sports fans, it gets much worse. It started on some comments on my brother's blog that made her the target for sarcasm. She claims that health care in this country sucks. I find that rather funny considering my Grandpop got 21 grand from medicare for his surgery that he wasn't even expected to survive...AND DID. 21 grand and health care sucks? Yeah, just hang in there, baby! She also claims my brother to be a disgrace when the fact of the matter is, he's just an asshole like me. Come on, laugh a little, enjoy the satire. We know you're trying to be serious, but we're not. What do you expect us to do? Say that America is horrible when there is NO country on this planet that is complete? Give me a BREAK. Maybe if you actually went to fucking college and graduated, you'd be able to afford insulin rather than blaming the government of this great nation for every single problem you have. "Ouch, an ant bit me. IT'S ALL GEORGE BUSH'S FAULT!!! HE LETS ANTS EXIST IN THIS COUNTRY!" Yes...its allllll the evil government's fault for ants, ice cream melting too fast, and crackers being too salty.
What makes her even more amusing is her local band idiot scenes. She goes to take pictures of these homo groups such as Amun Rah (being purposely misspelled since she nearly miscarriaged for me typoing swim) and probably holding her Hi-C in a plastic cup and nodding her head like the other losers at a local band scene do. It's probably just a secret PETA or Green Peace hideout for all the social rejects to hang out at and piss their time away playing grab ass and reading poetry. They won't last long and no one but the people of Boston will know about them.
Cats are the only thing salvaging that blog. Cats rock infinately and will soon be writing for Jesse once they are locked in a room and eventually type out A Tale of Two Cities.
So, after randomly coming up to her blog and "bashing her when we don't know shit" (hellloooo, this site isn't called The Truth for nothing), we find a great target to make fun of until she either gives up on this endeavor or this site no longer becomes profitable (which will never happen unless blogspot decides to run out of business because of how "cruel" I am). She prays for my brother's daughter...as do I. She was born to a responsible and intelligent man, and that's just terrible, folks, completely terrible. Children need to be born to drug dealers and "boys will be boys" types of moms who are lazy and have no respect for anyone opr anything. Yeah...what a perfect world that would be....woohoo.
Unfortunately, Jesse doesn't allow anonymous people to post on her blog, since she feels it'll be one of her family members or friends telling her how stupid and fucked up she's become. BE A MAN, YOU'RE EMBARASSING YOURSELF! Anyway, if you do have any lovely comments to type for her, please leave them here and I will make sure she personally gets them. Also, if anyone feels I am being mean to a lot of people, please tell me so I can send that to her as well and give her something small to hold onto. Be warned that you will be made fun of in some way regardless of what you type.
grey.fox37@gmail.com
The Randomness That Is Jesse perfectly emulates many of the points previously mentioned. It is a tragic tale of a girl born into a capitalist government to parents and friends that scorned her for her crazy left-wing ways, such as Barbie dolls being sex objects instead of political leaders, birds all over the world dying day by day, local band scene idiocity when she became a teen, to her whining of how the government screws her out of insulin and crystal meth. One day, however, she decided to take the path of her destiny, and, as Batman before her, donned her symbol: The Emo Glasses. Once put on, she feels the vibes of pseudo-intellectuality rise in her brain, giving her the necessary strength to bash the greatest country on the face of this planet. We shall call her The Dark Dork (sorry, Batman, you're still awesome in my book).
The title of the blog is pretty low on the boner meter (not to mention, elementary in the creativity department), unlike Gliss 'n' Goss, The Truth, and Freedom No Longer Frees You, but I can feel something move down there when I think of how awesome it could have been. Something like: "Dyke For Hire" or "Give Me My Fucking Insulin Or I Go Postal At Work Tomorrow." Man, I'm fucking awesome. I'm gonna go jack off to my thoughts now since I am such an egotistical asshole.
It doesn't stop there, sports fans, it gets much worse. It started on some comments on my brother's blog that made her the target for sarcasm. She claims that health care in this country sucks. I find that rather funny considering my Grandpop got 21 grand from medicare for his surgery that he wasn't even expected to survive...AND DID. 21 grand and health care sucks? Yeah, just hang in there, baby! She also claims my brother to be a disgrace when the fact of the matter is, he's just an asshole like me. Come on, laugh a little, enjoy the satire. We know you're trying to be serious, but we're not. What do you expect us to do? Say that America is horrible when there is NO country on this planet that is complete? Give me a BREAK. Maybe if you actually went to fucking college and graduated, you'd be able to afford insulin rather than blaming the government of this great nation for every single problem you have. "Ouch, an ant bit me. IT'S ALL GEORGE BUSH'S FAULT!!! HE LETS ANTS EXIST IN THIS COUNTRY!" Yes...its allllll the evil government's fault for ants, ice cream melting too fast, and crackers being too salty.
What makes her even more amusing is her local band idiot scenes. She goes to take pictures of these homo groups such as Amun Rah (being purposely misspelled since she nearly miscarriaged for me typoing swim) and probably holding her Hi-C in a plastic cup and nodding her head like the other losers at a local band scene do. It's probably just a secret PETA or Green Peace hideout for all the social rejects to hang out at and piss their time away playing grab ass and reading poetry. They won't last long and no one but the people of Boston will know about them.
Cats are the only thing salvaging that blog. Cats rock infinately and will soon be writing for Jesse once they are locked in a room and eventually type out A Tale of Two Cities.
So, after randomly coming up to her blog and "bashing her when we don't know shit" (hellloooo, this site isn't called The Truth for nothing), we find a great target to make fun of until she either gives up on this endeavor or this site no longer becomes profitable (which will never happen unless blogspot decides to run out of business because of how "cruel" I am). She prays for my brother's daughter...as do I. She was born to a responsible and intelligent man, and that's just terrible, folks, completely terrible. Children need to be born to drug dealers and "boys will be boys" types of moms who are lazy and have no respect for anyone opr anything. Yeah...what a perfect world that would be....woohoo.
Unfortunately, Jesse doesn't allow anonymous people to post on her blog, since she feels it'll be one of her family members or friends telling her how stupid and fucked up she's become. BE A MAN, YOU'RE EMBARASSING YOURSELF! Anyway, if you do have any lovely comments to type for her, please leave them here and I will make sure she personally gets them. Also, if anyone feels I am being mean to a lot of people, please tell me so I can send that to her as well and give her something small to hold onto. Be warned that you will be made fun of in some way regardless of what you type.
grey.fox37@gmail.com
posted by Grey Fox at 6:19 AM
16 Comments:
Wow. That was boring, and actually, it was your brother who commented on me first.
And you know nothing about me.
You said that you wanted to playfight and that was cool with me, but this is getting old really fast.
You are completely offbase on everything you said.
I don't write the real stuff in Blogger, thanks. Its just a silly/venting spot.
oh, and actually, if you decided to try to get to know me, you'd realize that I have quite the sarcastic, and sometimes snarky sense of humour just like you.
I can take jabs like the rest of them, but you're just getting a little excessive here, dahling.
Oh, and I only wear the glasses because I have to, but I happen to like my glasses. :)
I also like my local bands.
It's funny that you get all defensive at the jabs I took at your brother, which were merely a response to HIS jabs at ME. I make typos too. It's not a huge deal unless it's for school.
And for the record, PETA sucks.
And the lack of anonymous comments is ONLY because of excessive spam.
She says you're being defensive when she is coming to your site and practically bitching and getting uptight about the satire you used on her. How funny!
Alex
Gee, Alex, that was a real zinger.
Have a sticker.
Dude...Does Your Life Suck THAT Bad?
Don't you have better things to do than troll around and harass people who are just trying to live their lives?
If you don't like it, DON'T READ IT!
This girl really IS going through a lot of shit, that you probably wouldn't understand even if I spelled it out for you.... if you don't like her writing, change the channel and go somewhere else... Look, there's better ways to get over your lack of a penis, or how short you are...buy an expensive sports car...develop some self esteem . . learn some people skills... busting this girl's chops isn't really doing YOU or HER any good....
Thank you.
Jillian
hey, you fuckin sluts just shut the fuck up and let the man do his work. GOD
uncle leo
Oh yeah, some work belittling people for no real reason. How pathetic must your life be if you have to put people down to make yourself feel good?
And honey, I'm no slut. I'm a whore. And you sure as HELL couldn't afford me, fuckwit!
Jillian
There's always a reason and you keep giving more to me and my fans :D
I see you finally updated your site.
Jesse...Jillian...sigh, this is so difficult....but...two cents is affordable to anyone for a fuck. I know the truth hurts and I know you felt like millionares with all those pennies...but they aren't worth it...I'm sorry to be the bringer of bad news....
Darius "Nate Dogg"
Hey, Grey, I want to write for your site now. I'm sick and tired of sitting on the sidelines and watching these people try to belittle you
Ha ha ha, fight and struggle, fight and struggle!
Alex
Obviously, you DON'T have anything better to do. Some of us have ACTUAL lives and don't find it necessary to sit on our asses day in and day out degrading other people.
Grow up and grow a set, why don't you?
You people slay me.
I find it amusing that you (try to) insult me for not accepting anonymous posts, but your "faithful" readers are too wassy to make up bloggers and log the fuck in.
Also, how much of a pussy are you that you deleted certain comments because they put YOU down? Yeesh.
Anyway, like several people have said. Grow up.
No
He has to grow up just because he has a sense of humor and you fools don't. This continues to get better and better and better.
Darius
she's starting to put shit on her head now from her recent update and people say you have nothing better to do
uncle leo
Damn, I didn't realize how many people on here were gonna go bonkers! It's working, it's alllllivvvvvveeeeee
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